7 Tips To Improve Personal Relationships

Personal relationships are not easy, but neither are they as difficult as we think in the midst of conflict. Some people fail to interact adequately with others because of their shyness. Others, on the other hand, have traces of conflict in their history, perhaps because of a family environment in which they did not have good relations. This sometimes gives rise to and perpetuate controversies that lead to nothing. And, at other times, these people may view others with suspicion and apprehension.

We are not born with the ability or inability to build good personal relationships. It is true that there are certain genetic predispositions which make you more or less extroverted, more or less sociable. However, this is not decisive. Interacting adequately with others is, above all, a learning process. It requires the development of certain faculties which are within the reach of all.

There are also some tips that make this learning easier. These are little tips, very easy to apply and effective in achieving our goal: to improve our personal relationships. We will tell you about it right away.

Train your listening skills

Listening is not, or should not be, limited to being silent while the other is speaking. It goes far beyond that: listening means placing our attention in the content and form of the message that the other is trying to send to us. It is not a question of remaining silent but of going part of the way to meet what the other is saying, suggesting or insinuating. It is not a question either of muzzling our internal dialogue but of directing it towards what the other is telling us.

When it comes to developing listening skills, there is nothing better than listening. Fine, but how? Try to stay silent, just trying to pick up on what you are being told. In the beginning, you will have to make a conscious effort so that your attention does not escape; however, once you do, the temptation to scatter will not be so great.

Practice your empathy

Active listening and empathy go hand in hand. Fixing our attention on the message that we are trying to convey to us opens up a possibility, that of understanding it from the context of the other and not from our own. This is what empathy is: being able to put yourself in other people’s shoes, understanding the process that makes them think like they think and act like they act.

Thus, empathy requires more an open attitude than a critical attitude. Everyone is as they are and do what they do for reasons that are very often beyond our control. But by what right would we question them? We lose a lot when we fail to establish empathy. We are losing learning, expanding experiences and the opportunity to improve our personal relationships.

Have confidence in what you do and say

A confident attitude generates confidence in others. The opposite also happens: when someone is dubious or uncertain, they create a defensive response in those who are beside them. Practicing trust is not that difficult. Just give who you are a chance, remembering that in who you are right now is who you would like to become.

Fear is one of the most tender emotions in a conversation, thus constituting, and in some contexts, an obstacle for personal relationships. Very often, in order to distance ourselves from its influence, we only need a little practice. To do this, try not to take too many pauses in your communication and look more for conversation than speeches or monologues.

You don’t have to turn yourself into a talkative, witty, or funny person. You just have to find a way to communicate naturally. Thus, overly measured speech may be interpreted by those listening to it as an attempt to hide something… when the only thing you want to hide is your fear of showing yourself as you are. Why ?

Smile, smile all the time

To say that a smile opens a lot of doors is a ready-made phrase, a commonplace. However, the fact that we already know this does not prevent it from being entirely true. A smile breaks down barriers, builds an emotional climate based on friendliness and helps reduce tension. Besides, it’s completely free!

To motivate yourself, tell yourself that a smile is a sign of peace and acceptance:  a kind gesture that allows good communication. It is an act that breaks the ice and invites confidence. Nothing better, to elevate personal relationships, than to begin each new meeting with a smile. Thus, it has been proven in several studies that people are more likely to get closer to someone who smiles.

Good manners

Good manners will never go out of fashion or cease to be the keys to opening main doors. Moreover, with practice, they will gain in naturalness, by ceasing to give this sensation of artifice which lead some to believe that it is a mark of falsity when they only aim to inspire respect. and consideration.

Of course,  there are many polite marks that are nothing more than adornments. Others, on the other hand, are fundamental and should not be overlooked. For example, the good habit of saying hello and goodbye, saying thank you, not interrupting the other person when they are speaking, allowing the other to come first… These are small gestures that show your good disposition. get along with other people.

It is also necessary to underline the importance of one of the good manners which is lost. It has a link with the cell phone. Unless you are expecting an urgent call, your best bet is to leave it out of your immediate reach and sight,  where it cannot distract you. You will surely not lose anything important if you switch off your phone for a while; on the contrary, you will gain a lot.

Learn to manage your anger

You learn to manage your anger, just like any other emotion. There is a golden standard that in times of anger can help us. If you feel disturbed, first of all, think of only three things: do nothing, do nothing, stay quiet. It’s that simple. Anger will not make it easier to resolve the conflict.

Here, as in other cases, you just have to practice. This attitude is learned through repetitions. You just have to wait for some of the energy carried by the emotion to disperse, enough to get the message across in a better form, which will be better for you and for the relationship. By doing this, you will send a message of self-control and show the respect you have for yourself and for one another.

Personal relationships deteriorate, in large part, because of poor anger management. When it takes hold of us, we expose our worst side and can even become very cruel. Especially with the people we love, because we know very well the points that hurt them.

Everything (or most of it) is in the details

There are a series of attitudes or little details that significantly increase the quality of personal relationships. These are simple gestures that speak of nobility and good disposition towards others. It is good to incorporate them into your way of being. Here are some of these gestures:

• Give sincere compliments to others. We are not too used to saying the good things we think about others… while saying it is always a source of satisfaction.
• Call people by their first name.
• The person affected by a problem decides its importance.
• During a controversy, tell the other person that you value their point of view and want to understand them.
• Show interest in what the other is thinking or feeling.

• Don’t try to change the way other people think.

Good personal relationships are the result of effort. Even though some people come into the world better equipped to interact easily with others, we all have something to learn. This is especially valid when we have a long history of difficulty communicating or when the list of conflicts we have within us is very large.

If you can increase the quality of your personal relationships, your whole life will be enriched. It will increase your self-confidence as well as your general feeling of well-being. When interactions with others are constructive, we feel more motivated, calmer and happier.